How Navigating Childcare Has Made Me a Better Business Owner
For so many of us, family and career are two of the most rewarding parts of life, but navigating both often brings a mix of challenges and difficulties. I’ve learned over the years that raising kids and raising a business are not so different from one another. They both take determination, fortitude, and an abundance of patience.
Since starting MLD in 2017, and bringing two kids into the world since then, I’ve had to learn how to put on two hats and be present as a business owner and leader, and also as a mother. As my two littles have gotten older, childcare has been a big part of my life and my learning journey, and it’s greatly impacted my perspective on owning a business.
What makes childcare so hard? Well, it’s really never predictable. And for all you working parents, I’m sure you can relate to that challenge.
At the end of the day, you’re managing life hour by hour, day to day, and year to year. As any parent will attest, kid’s lives with school, camp, naps, general moods, sickness, activities, and so much more are in constant evolution, and sometimes you just have to roll with the punches!
We all know the saying — the only constant thing in life is change. But so many of us are not in roles to manage the impacts of change on our children, our parents, our caregivers, our spouses, our employees, our friends, our finances, and our clients. Is it a lot to manage? OF COURSE! But the beautiful thing amidst navigating constant change is the consistency of growth in yourself.
I’m constantly confronted with the internal dialogue of “you can’t do this today, how will you do this, this won’t work, this person will be disappointed today because I can’t get X,Y,Z done”. But then you start to pull the pieces together and you realize you can, and it will all work out.
Through the ups and downs, successes and stumblings, I’ve found a few things have helped me immensely through this constantly changing journey.
Planning Early (and I mean really early)
When I start planning my months for childcare, I am looking three months out.
Fortunately for my husband and I, we have family nearby, and I can tell you that without the help of grandparents, the struggle would be even more intense. Whenever we need support, they are always there in a pinch! Love our sweet mawmaw, pawpaw, grandpa and gran especially (aka my lifesavers).
My husband, Dan, has also been a rock and stepped up in so many ways to help us navigate family life and operate our business. He is our family chef, cooking all the meals (which is no small feat with toddlers!). He works tirelessly on the house and landscaping (he even just finished building our kids an epic treehouse that they love. But he’s taken on so much more than that too - managing our finances, travel planning, navigating school and camp schedules, and managing our family calendar. He’s the best dad and an incredible support system to me as we navigate raising littles and owning a business together.
I of course learned the hard way that by trying to lock down childcare needs a week or month in advance, I was actually creating constant stress, because then it became a scramble to fill in the margins of the unexpected.
I can tell you that with my life, I live in the unexpected, but my mindset has changed to plan for the unplannable. This one shift has made a world of difference. It’s taken multiple years, but I’ve worked on my network of childcare support enough that I can happily say it's worth it and continues to be. Check out this beautiful super star Isabella – an absolute gem and without a doubt one of the main reasons why I was able to manage a business successfully with a one and four year old (now two and five).
I had to be okay with asking for help, which for me, was the hardest part! But now, I not only prepare for the unexpected, I prepare to take care of myself. Because moms and dad out there, our mental health is important and needs to be prioritized too. I utilize childcare for time in the day to go to a coffee shop, look around a store, maybe even get a tv show in.
You may be wondering how planning early applies to business ownership? Intentional recruiting.
As a growing agency, and resource partner to many in the community, we have to always be looking for talent. I used to think, “This is a season of growth, so we’ll be temporarily hiring” (similar to the childcare “window of need” perspective), but it's not a one-time project. It's management, and it's constant. My eyes and ears are always open to what we need and who would be a good fit for our team. When I start to see a team member touching a little bit of burn out, that's when I start getting more aggressive and actively recruiting, but the search is always constant.
Weighing All the Variables
The thing about finding support is giving yourself time to understand the support needs.
I constantly ask myself, “What is going on in my schedule for a particular day? What are my time frames? Will there be nap times I can utilize? Will there be carpooling in between? Can I take that call from the car? Will I need a screen during that time slot? Does that call qualify the spend on childcare? There are so many questions to consider for every childcare decision.
Navigating all these variables is fascinating in nature, because it tends to ultimately go back to values and what motivates you in life. For instance, can my mental health withstand another day of juggling kids and calls all day? Or do I need this childcare to spend focused energy on this client’s needs, an operational process, a potential huge business opportunity? Or, maybe I need to slow down that day and plan some time off to spend with my kiddos and coordinate a heavier work week next week to make up for the time.
Taking Time for Reflection & Activating Mental Muscles
You are likely thinking, “Wow this sounds so stressful and a lot of work, how do you live life with that much pressure?
I’ve learned the power of slowing down and investing in frameworks that create sustainable living for me as a working mom of two littles. And the acceptance of this management role in my family and work has played a huge part. I journal a lot, and I read back over lesson after lesson from this life of juggling all the things I love, and it gives me a sense of peace that pushes out the fear and pressures that come with it.
I also tend to ask myself a lot of questions that I take time to think about. “What kind of owner do I want to be? What kind of mother do I want to be? What kind of wife do I want to be? What kind of boss would I want? What kind of employee would I want to have? What kind of team-mate/co-worker would I want to work with? Was I a good friend today?” Reflecting on the answers has impacted the way I run my business and how I approach motherhood in turn.
The Long Lasting Rewards
Some days are inevitably longer and harder than others. Are there days where I feel beaten down with no energy left to give? Absolutely! But there is so much good that comes from the most challenging of times.
For me, the strategic response to navigating being a business owner and managing childcare has created a deeper reward in it all.
Rewards from doing the personal work (mostly the parenting side because it's so hard!):
Decreased negative thoughts that find their way into peaceful shower time
Patience with the ever challenging car seat tango
You’re showing up and you know it, so you feel and exude more confidence
More deep breaths. Never having enough arms doesn’t become a mental breakdown, because you have time for a second trip to the car.
Laughing more. Taking things too seriously can drive you bonkers in the seasons of childcare needs.
Greater Sense of Purpose
Being a parent and owning a business is challenging, but the rewards are sweet. It’s amazing to look back at the growth of your kids, your team, and yourself through all the successes and frustrations to see where you started and how far you’ve come.
To all you parents who are balancing a career, managing a team, and raising tiny humans, hang in there! Whether it’s navigating childcare or taking a new risk, you’re doing a great job, and don’t forget to be grateful for the lessons. Because you’re positively impacting those around you in big ways and growing through every one — even if you can’t see it yet.
For me, navigating childcare and owning a business has given me a greater sense of purpose. I want to be viewed, especially by my daughter, as the woman and mom she wants to be like, and the owner I would respect for decades to come — and those are the greatest motivators of all.